I'm too ugly. No one will ever love me.

"I'm too ugly. I don't like this photo. I look fat. My face is too round. My beard looks dirty and gross. I'm not attractive. I will never be good enough. No one will ever love me." These are the thoughts the went through my head when I saw this photo, taken by my friend this morning over breakfast. I have these kinds of self-criticizing thoughts quite often, particularly when I see photos of myself. In elementary school I was teased for being fat. I was picked on by people who I thought were my friends. The emotional scars from those days haven't left me, and likely I will carry that baggage for the rest of my life.

Fortunately, my friend (the one who took the photo) and I had just come from the morning mindfulness meditation group in Chiang Mai, and I had enough mindful awareness to see those thoughts of self-criticism and self-judgment as they were arising. Just seeing the thoughts as they arose allowed me to not get sucked so deeply into their negativity. I didn't identify with the self-hatred. Instead, I just noticed it as a passing thought, and was able to redirect my attention to more positive qualities of myself and feel a little more appreciation for my body. It was a powerful moment of choosing self-love over self-loathing.

Today, I want to share a few quotes on self-love. For all of you out there who struggle, or have ever struggled, with body image issues or low self-esteem, these quotes are for you.

5 quotes on self-love and self-esteem:

1. “Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one’s own sunshine.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

2. “You have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” – Louise L. Hay

3. “There are days I drop words of comfort on myself like falling leaves and remember that it is enough to be taken care of by myself.” – Brian Andreas

4. “Your problem is you’re… too busy holding onto your unworthiness.” – Ram Dass

5. “When I loved myself enough, I began leaving whatever wasn’t healthy. This meant people, jobs, my own beliefs and habits – anything that kept me small. My judgement called it disloyal. Now I see it as self-loving.” – Kim McMillen